What the Helk is up with my Hellth?

What the helk (as my friends 3 year old says) is up with my HELL-th? (hubby and I were debating religion so I guess this just popped in my head) I'm so pissed off and unsure what to think/do etc right now.

end jan-got cold Feb-doc visit #1 FEV best ever even with cold left doc turned down orals since they dont work and was convinced it'd be 'ok' feb-doc visit #2 PFT's down from prior weeks visit, more run down feeling (sick about 5 weeks by now), but doc said numbers were still looking good so option for orals or IV's I went with orals dumb dumb move.

end feb-->Mar-did 2 weeks cipro and did not feel better, waited a week to see hwo things went then went in for follow up numbers were lower and feeling abotu same, perhaps more productive cough. FEV1 down about 15% Mar-1 week IV TOBI/Ceftaz PFT's caught stomach flu followed promptly by head cold, week one showed I had recouped 5/15%. Felt slow progress due to flu bugs and stayed same course for week

2 Mar-week2-IV TOBI Ceftaz I knew it was not working thought maybe I was being a pessimist, down 2% from the first week. Believed that my achromabacter was source problem instead PA so switched from ceftaz to merropenem and added levaquin for week

3 Mar-->April-week 3 sick as a dog with nausea and diarhea will never do merropenem without IV zofran again. Numbers highest ever at FEV1 of 105.3 but I dont feel 'right' tell doc, ask steroids, tell them something is 'stuck' but to no avail I get the '#'s look too good routine' and sent on my way.

April-one week post anti's. Go back see doc #2 at clinci tell him my concern including the feeling from previous week and some intermittent light pain in my right lung/shoulder blade area (that I got a chiro adjustmetn and massage for to ensur eit was not muscle) he does a very thorough exam and chest x ray with the results of all of them looking good. I tell him I no longer feel soemthing is stuck and I did get some good stuff up after taking mucinex. My PFT's are showing 20% variability anywhere from 5 to 25% below prior week, we look at the prior week and it too showed high degree variability (unusual for me) and we accounted it to teh 'stuck' feeling I was having as after I felt something move I got the really high number. Doc #2 believes that I have some lingering bronchitis that seems to be improving since I am feeling less like soemthing is stuck and believes it will continue to resolve on its own. He asks if I accept this and I say yeah I'll buy it (thats on tue).

But, over the course week up until this past fri I just feel soemthing is not 'right'. Friday (3 days ago) I caught a throat bug where you sound hoarse but dont feel bad but then it progressed to me having a slight temp and feeling bad by the evening, I remained the same throughout the weekend. Sunday was better but I was pretty wiped out by the night time. Monday (today) I felt like every time I breathe there is a string tied to my shoulder area pulling on it, it hurts. It was that way in morning and I was so tired, I slept in and went to work late, I jogged for a couple miles before work trying to get some stuff up, I was very productive cough all morning of some really dark nasty stuff then this evening I BLEED I have not had hemoptysis since I was doing IVF in Mar2006. I was standing in bathroom, coughed and whammo, there it is, I didnt feel it building this time of course I missed some signs since it has been so long and my back etc is already sore like it was this morning. I absolutely hate coughing up blood but there it was, it was bright red and tiny little clots. There was not alot of it, a teaspoon or so, perhaps more later when it was mixed wiht mucous. I am so pissed off, I KNEW somethign was wrong, now of course they will believe me. I have waited a couple hours and it stopped so I am fine. I am thinking of pagin them anyway because they will tell me to go to hopsital and I will tell them NO I am not any more sick today then I was last week when I TOLD YOU something was wrong.

Anyway I am just pissed of at my body and I have NO idea what is going on. I knwo this is so minor compared to most folks but since it is the worst I have experienced (not rebounding) it is bad to me. I am taking over a very busy highly visible area right now and I already missed three weeks, there is so much I can do in that area and I can make big changes and I have already started and I just dont want to miss. My company overall is being idiots though and not issuing laptops so they did not get me a laptop, now maybe they will, otherwise they can keep paying me (since I am salary) to do nothing, they could have more than paid forrmy laptop many times over with the # they are paying me to do nothing. I really cannot afford to miss more time but I will be putting my health first----I have to keep reminding myself of that.

Anyway if you have any ideas suggestions thoughts let me know I culture PA and achromabacter x have ABPA which I dont think ahs flaired up due to being on xolair but I will get an IGE drawn tomorrow anyway, on allergy shots, advair, singulair, zyrtec, nasacort, multi, calium, magnesium, B vitamin, vitamin C, probiotic, TOBI, xopenex, hypertonic, 2 vials pulmozyme.